On Tuesday, Prime Minister Mark Rutte announced that the semi-lockdown that The Netherlands has been in since March 12, due to the outbreak of the coronavirus, will at least be extended until April 26. The bizarre situation in which we currently find ourselves requires us to reflect and recalibrate. Many of us are used to meeting up at cafes and restaurants, at the gym, or at school. Social life as we know it has come to an abrupt end. And whilst this current situation can be unsettling in many ways, we can also use this time to discover new ways of spending our days.

To help you fine-tune your own quaroutines, we asked some of our (and probably also your) favorite people from NL and around the globe what their days in quarantine look. In the first article of this new series none other than activist and drag king extraordinaire Thorn Vineyard, singer and storyteller Rajae El Mouhandiz, and American journalist and writer Soraya Chemaly will tell us what keeps them sane during these uncertain times.

Get inspired, but do not forget that, although it is easy to fall into the trap of hyper-productivity and activity, it is also more than fine to do nothing at all.

Your level of productivity does not define who you are.

“Loneliness is the enemy in times of isolation. By reaching out to others, you do not only keep yourself away from loneliness, but you are also helping someone else”

Thorn Vineyard
You might know Thorn Vineyard as an activist for trans and non-binary rights, or as one of the ballroom scene’s fiercest drag kings, or perhaps you have listened to their podcast CoupleGoals in which they discuss queer and unconventional relationships with their partner presenter Mandy Woelkens. Thorn talked to us about their healthy routine and the importance of checking in with the people around you.

What did you do while in semi-lock down that you had postponed before?
Yes, well first of all, my girlfriend and I cleaned up our house. You know those chores that you just keep postponing and postponing? Haha. Well, now is the time to finally get them done.

I also took on a new project that has been in the back of my mind for a while. I have been wanting to make a website for non-binary (or questioning) youths and their parents. A place for information. I never found the time to actually get started, but now I am already half-way. I also have a lot administrative work to do.

What does your day look like in quarantaine?
I wake up around 8, I roll out a yoga mat, and I exercise for 20/30 minutes. My gym is closed at the moment, but they post daily routines and workouts on Instagram. So it is easy to figure out what to do. I meditate, then take a shower, and eat breakfast. Later I check the news and get to work.

At the moment, ‘work’ means creating my website, learning scripts, doing my administration, and cleaning up the house. I am a freelancer, so all of my paid jobs have either been cancelled or postponed. But I want to keep busy. And because my girlfriend (who I live with) is in the risk group, I social distance myself as much as possible. I always go outside for at least 30 minutes to walk and get some fresh air. Then of course I also try to make room for some fun, like drawing, playing board games, or just watching a movie. Finally, I go to bed, around 10 or 11 p.m.

What do you do against anxiety and all the news?
I think it is important to follow the news and stay up to date with the right sources on the current situation. But I do not want to be occupied with the virus-stress all the time. I made a deal with myself to only check the news on certain moments, like during or after breakfast, lunch and dinner. And definitely not before I go to sleep. Meditation also helps me to clear my mind. And if I get really frustrated or worried, I like to go outside. I live in Amsterdam-Noord, and there is quite some isolated nature around here. A change of scenery can definitely help sometimes.

What do you think we need to get through this?
Each other. This will not stop until we all work together and follow the same strategy. We also need to support each other during these times. Whether it is financially, mentally, physically, or just by sending one of your friends a quick message saying: “Hey, u ok?”.

Loneliness is the enemy in times of isolation. By reaching out to others, you do not only keep yourself away from loneliness, but you are also helping someone else. And of course, if you are in any way capable of helping others in any way possible, please do so. Small things, like asking your 70-year-old neighbor if they need help walking their dog or doing groceries, can make a huge difference. Another thing we need is the right information. If you read something, check your sources. Read reliable news pages and do not panic when you get a WhatsApp message that might contain fake news.

What are you thankful for in these times?
The fact that I am healthy. The internet. It helps me to stay in touch with my family and friends. It makes isolation a lot less isolated. Meditation, I once did a Vipassana, 10 days of silence meditation in India, and I am really reaping the benefits right now.

“To share wisdom with as many beautiful people as possible”

Rajae El Mouhandiz

Dutch-Moroccan creative-allrounder Rajae El Mouhandiz is not only known for her beautiful voice. She is also a poet, a storyteller, a filmmaker, a composer, a director, a curator, a record label owner…The list goes on. Lilith worked together with her on the Stedelijk Museum Schiedam exposition on Modest Fashion with rapper Mona Haydar. We talked to Rajae about what she does to keep the anxiety at bay.

Photograpy Charlotte Apituley

What did you do while in semi-lock down that you had postponed before?
Actually, I have been busy organizing old archive material, papers, music, CDs, tapes, and clothes. Now is the time to finish the job, so those two corners can spark joy again.

What does your day look like in quarantaine?
My days are slow. I make sure I am rested, hydrated, fed and calm. I stay home (STAY HOME DEAR PEOPLE), read up, process thoughts, and take it really slow. I prepare delicious healthy food and ginger and honey shots, and I listen to lots of uplifting music

What do you do against anxiety and all the news?
Being someone who suffers from anxiety, I have had to learn to keep my system calm, and to calm my system when I am overwhelmed. What helps is to keep my breath centered and my energy aligned. I also make sure to mute drama online and offline, and keep triggers far away --be it people or the media. The mute button really is amazing.

What do you think we need to get through this?
What we need to get through this is to alter our universe and embrace humility and gratitude. Here in the Netherlands we will be alright. We might panic for a while, but we will be alright. Our government is fairly transparent, our healthcare is accessible, and we will not have to be afraid of enormous bills afterwards. Our foundation is shaking, but our social security system will step in. What we need is unity, humility, and gratitude for the access to healthcare, our frugal economy, and Dutch pragmatism. And we need new platforms such as Lilith and Ellae to elevate the voices of the under-represented, once the system gets going again. We will need circles, gatherings, shared resources, and solidarity to feel safe, seen and to be part of a supportive system, as we build each other up again and celebrate health and oxygen.

What are you thankful for in these times?
I am thankful for life, for oxygen, for a strong immune system, for strong ancestors, and strong role models. I am thankful for financial independence, for the roof over my head, for voting rights, for a fridge filled with real food, for access to healthcare, for art, for knowing my history, for access to places of privilege, and for a mic on rec., which allows me to share knowledge, privilege, and wisdom with as many beautiful people as possible.

“Normal was not working for most people in the first place and this pandemic has put cruelty and gross inequality into sharp relief.”

Soraya Chemaly
Soraya Chemaly is an American award-winning writer, media critic, and journalist. Last year Lilith organised a event with her as head guest about her bestselling book Rage Becomes Her: The Power of Women’s Anger at Paradiso Amsterdam. Soraya tells us about life at home and her hopes for a different world post-corona.

What did you do while in semi-lock down that you had postponed before? I sleep, I exercise, and I do not rush. Throughout this process I have really been struck by how many activists I know needed a mandatory lockdown to start taking the most basic care of themselves.

What does your day look like quarantined? I wake up and I meditate. This is a new habit that I like. Then I down my three shots of espresso and I talk to my family as they move through their morning routines. Then I try very hard to do some writing. By the late afternoon, I start organizing dinner. There are five of us and constant food production is a challenge to be honest. I also exercise for 30 minutes. As a break I sanitize high-touch surfaces throughout the day. My family eats dinner together, which is nice because during the day we try to find some quiet time. My kids still take classes remotely. Our house is not very big for five people, so finding privacy and quiet can be a challenge. Having dinner is a nice way to be together though. I am a night owl by nature, so I read long into the night and I wake up later than I have in years. Ironically, I feel more rested and healthier.

What do you do against anxiety and all the news? I really dose the amount of news I take in. I will not waste any time or metal energy watching or listening to Donald Trump or Mike Pence for example, so no press conferences. I tend to check the news regarding Coronavirus in the morning before I start working, then I try to turn it off. Meditating, exercising, and finding ways to laugh with my family eases the anxiety. I also focus on the fact that there is really not much that we can control and that all we can do is try our best. I am trying to accept the uncertainty.

What do you think we need to get through this? We need patience, compassion, kindness, and creativity. I am amazed when I hear people say that they cannot wait to get back to their normal lives in a few weeks. That is simply not happening. “Normal” was not working for most people in the first place and this pandemic has put cruelty and gross inequality into sharp relief. I hope that whatever constitutes "normal" will in the future include a better social and public appreciation for the failures of our society. Secondly, in terms of freedom of movement, travel, assembly, travel, life will not go back to the way it was before for years to come. We need to envision new ways of working, socially gathering, caring for the most vulnerable in our lives, and managing our economies.

What are you thankful for in these times? I am thankful for my family and friends. I am lucky to live with people I feel safe and happy with. This is something never to be taken for granted. I am thankful for people that are creative, resilient, and funny. I am also grateful for those who continue to fight against oppressive systems. I am particularly grateful to the truth tellers among us.

Quaroutine: how some of your faves survive quarantine